I’ve spent the last decade slowly overcoming many fears from skydiving to public speaking to trying new diets.
Social media is filled with quotes about overcoming fear and stepping out of your comfort zone. This content is fun to read, but it’s completely useless if we don’t actually do something.
It’s time for us to slap fear across the face today for once and for all! We can’t let fear dictate how we feel and look. Life’s far too amazing to live it hiding.
Are you read to conquer your fears?
“If you can embrace the idea that your success and happiness are tied up in defeating the fear that’s holding you back, you’re 90 percent of the way to where you need to go, because no, we’re not kids, and no, this is not a bike.” — Seth Godin
That’s a shot of me skydiving in 2018 at 30 years old.
Let’s start with a rather sad story from 2005…
I got to the gym. I was all ready to go. I looked inside. I saw how many people were in there. I got nervous and drove away. Yes, this really happened. I just drove away and drove around for a bit so that my family wouldn’t ask about why my workout was so short. I was afraid to enter the gym. I was too nervous.
Now I walk into my gym like I own the place and start chatting with everyone. A pretty sharp contrast from that evening where I just drove off because I saw so many people inside.
The gym is an intimidating place until you conquer it.
How do you slap fear around?
Being afraid is normal.
There’s nothing wrong with being nervous or damn scared at times. This is a secret that you must know.
- Approaching strangers is nerve wrecking.
- Attempting to cook is scary.
- Telling your friends that you’re going to join a gym can be a daunting task.
- Swinging a kettlebell doesn’t feel right.
- Putting the lightest weight possible on the squat rack isn’t all that fun when you see what the other guys are pushing.
- Running a half-marathon with no training is frightening.
- Telling your friends that you’re trying a new style of eating feels strange.
It’s common to be afraid.
I’m not saying that there’s anything wrong with having fears and being nervous at times. The problem comes in doing nothing. The problem is when we don’t take any action against our fears. The problem is when when we become a little bitch about everything.
It’s easy to run away and hide. Anyone can do that. You’re not just anyone. You’re not here to be like everyone.
How do you conquer your fears?
There are three things that I do to slap fear across the face. This applies to all sorts of fears: dating, food, training, life, and everything in general.
I ask myself: What’s the worst case scenario?
Seriously, what’s the worst that can happen? I always ask myself this question. Below are times I used this in the last year or so…
Before a huge rollercoaster. I don’t really care for rollercoasters. I didn’t want to go on it. However, I didn’t want to embarrass myself. So I just asked myself the important question. I realized that the worst case scenario would be me yelling for a few minutes. That’s not so bad. It beats no going on the rollercoaster and looking like a little coward.
Before my half-marathon. I thought to myself about the worst case scenario. The absolute worst was that I would either not finish or have to walk. After that, the other worst case scenario was that I would be sore for a long time.
Guess what happened? I completed it and was damn sore after! I survived though.
Also, I just asked myself, what’s the worst that can happen? Right before I booked my flight to Argentina. The worst case scenario is that I have a boring time and my Spanish sucks. Oh well, that’s certainly not the end of the world.
I take a small step in the right direction.
“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy” – Dale Carnegie
What can you do next? There always has to be a small step.
For example, I’m trying to build the best damn fitness blog on the whole Internet here. That’s pretty bold. So instead of stressing over the boldness, I’m working on it, one article at a time.
I also refer to this quote whenever I’m not being bold:
“You wanna be afraid, really afraid, take a look at what your life’ll look like not if you try and fail… but if you keep on keeping on for decades. That’s the real nightmare scenario for most people.” – Jonathan Fields
Just one tiny step in the right direction beats nothing.
When I went to the gym the next day, I walked in! I didn’t own the place or terrorize anyone. I performed quick workout and left. Beats leaving like a little bitch!
I use the reward/punishment system.
This is pretty simple. I reward myself for good behaviour and punish myself for poor performance.
Let’s look at eating:
If I eat well all week, I treat myself to a cheat day on Saturday.
If I eat poorly, I follow up with a 24 hour fast or an intense run. Guess what? I hate running.
Simple rewards and punishments will go a long way. Give it a try.
Who has got your back? I do. We do. There’s nothing worth fearing to the point where you don’t want to leave home. Anything and everything can be conquered. You came here to build an unconventional life and to feel sexier than ever. You’re going to be able to do this.
What are you so afraid of? Slap that fear around. I’m here to help you. That’s all you need.
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